I am a therapist. I help people get their s#*t together. I have done it for a long time, now I’m talking it worldwide. I’m sorry I don’t know why I said that… it sounded cool in my head. I am working on a book; it is called Get Your S#*t Together. It is an attempt to help people get their s#*t together. The intent of my book and this blog is to share the things that I have learned. There are a handful of patterns that I see over and over in people’s lives that keep them from moving forward. I want to help people realize those patterns in their lives.
When I was a kid, before the internet, cell phones and cable TV, my family played card games. My favorite was called bulls#*t. It probably wasn’t the game itself that I liked as much as the fact that I had permission to say bulls#*t, in front of my parents. A free pass on cussing is exactly the kind of the thing that this guy involved. The point of the game is to get rid of all the cards in your hand. The first player must discard aces, the second twos and so on in rank order. You do not in fact have to play the rank you are calling. You may get rid of any card or mixture of cards at your discretion. Any player who suspects that the cards discarded do not match the rank called can challenge the play by calling “bulls#*t!” If they are all of the rank that was called, the caller must pick up the whole discard pile and incorporate it into their hand. If someone is called on their bullshit, and they were bullsh#*ting, they must pick up the whole discard pile.
An easy way for me to explain what I do as a therapist is “call bulls#*t.” I do it subtly and with a lot more finesse that when I was ten. I don’t slam my hand down on the table like I did when I was a cuss-drunk kid and yell it out loud. In fact when I am doing it right, I gently lift the veil and help the client call their own bulls#*t. Some folks are pretty entrenched in the idea that they are free from personal bulls#*t. To them I might say something like, “The way you tell it, it does seem as if the world is out to get you and all of the bulls#*t resides with other people, what are you going to do?” Usually they will cop to some sort of personal bulls#*t and we have a starting point.
You know the expression, “Give a person a fish and he eats for a day; teach a person to fish and he eats for a life time”? I have my own version, it goes like this: “Call a person’s bulls#*t for a day and something might happen – most likely resentment, but teach a person to recognize and call their own bulls#*t they might move forward a little.” My version isn’t quite as fluid and hasn’t really caught on yet, but I am optimistic that good things will happen.
The reader isn’t sitting across from me so I can’t call bulls#*t, but I do hope that I can plant a seed. Be warned though, some seeds may not feel like they will bear fruit at first. They might feel like a thorn. Something might ring a little true or make you squirm in your seat. If it does, start looking for your own bulls#*t, I’ll bet you that it is close. If you read what I have to say in the posts to come and your feathers bristle it might be the start of something big.